George W. Bush Resume
Past work experience:
- Ran for congress and lost.
- Produced a Hollywood slasher B movie.
- Bought an oil company, couldn't find any oil in Texas; company went
bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.
- Bought Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land
using taxpayer money. Biggest move: Traded Sammy Sosa to the Chicago
Cubs.
- With fathers help (and his name) was elected Governor of Texas.
Accomplishments:
- Changed pollution laws for power and oil companies and made Texas the
most polluted state in the Union.
- Replaced Los Angeles with Houston as the most smog-ridden city in
America.
- Cut taxes and bankrupted Texas govt to the tune of billions in borrowed
money.
- Set record for most executions by any Governor in American history.
- Became President after losing the popular vote by over 500,000 votes,
with the help of my father's appointments to the Supreme Court.
Accomplishments as President:
- Attacked and took over two countries: Afghanistan & Iraq. Who's next?
- Spent the surplus and bankrupted the treasury.
- Shattered record for biggest annual deficit in world history.
- Set economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.
- Set all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.
- Set all-time record for biggest drop in the history of the stock
market. (Stock market hasn't had 3 down years since the 1930's!)
- First President in decades to execute a federal prisoner.
- First President in US history to enter office with a criminal record.
- First year in office set all-time record for most days on vacation by
any President in US history.
- After taking entire month of August off for vacation, presided over
worst security failure in US history: 9/11.
- Set record for most campaign fundraising trips of any President in US history.
- In first two years in office over 2 million Americans lost their job.
- Cut unemployment benefits for more out of work Americans than any President in US history.
- Appointed more convicted criminals to administration positions than any
President in US history. (5 felony John Poindexter of Iran-Contra,etc.)
- Set record for least amount of press conferences of any President since advent of TV.
- Signed more laws & executive orders amending Constitution than any President in US history.
- Presided over the biggest energy crises in US history and refused to
intervene when corruption was revealed.
- Presided over highest gasoline prices in US history & refused to use
national reserves as past Presidents have done.
- Cut healthcare benefits for war veterans.
- Set all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously take to
the streets to protest (15 million), shattering the record for protest
against any person in history of mankind.
- Dissolved more international treaties than any President in US history.
- Presidency is the most secretive and unaccountable of any in US history.
- Members of cabinet are the richest of any administration in US history.
(the 'poorest' multimillionaire, Condoleeza Rice has an Exxon oil tanker named after her).
- First President in US history to have all 50 states of the Union simultaneously go bankrupt.
- Presided over biggest corporate stock market fraud of any market in any
country in the history of the world.
- First President in US history to order a US attack & military
occupation of a sovereign nation.
- Created largest government department bureaucracy in history of the United States.
- Set all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases, more
than any President in US history.
- First President in US history to have United Nations remove the US from
the human rights commission.
- First President in US history to have United Nations remove the US from
the elections monitoring board.
- Removed more checks & balances, & have least amount of congressional
oversight of any presidential administration in US history.
- Rendered the entire United Nations irrelevant. (see War on Iraq)
- Withdrew from the World Court of Law.
- Refused to allow inspectors access to US prisoners of war (and by
default no longer abide by the Geneva Conventions.)
- First President in US history to refuse United Nations election
inspectors (during the 2002 US elections).
- All-time US (and world) record holder for most corporate campaign donations.
- My biggest lifetime campaign contributor presided over one of the
largest corporate bankruptcy frauds in world history (Kenneth Lay,
former CEO of Enron Corporation).
- Spent more money on polls and focus groups than any President in US history.
- First President in US history to unilaterally attack a sovereign nation
against the will of the United Nations and the world community.
- First President to hide when the US came under attack (and then lied
saying the enemy had the code to Air Force 1)
- First US President to establish a secret shadow government.
- Took the biggest world sympathy for the US after 9/11, and in less than
a year made the US the most resented country in the world (possibly the
biggest diplomatic failure in US and world history).
- With a policy of 'disengagement' helped create the most hostile
Israeli-Palestine relations in at least 30 years.
- First US President in history to have a majority of the people of
Europe (71%) view Presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and stability.
- First US President in history to have the people of South Korea more
threatened by the US than their immediate neighbor, North Korea.
- Changed US policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.
- Set all-time record for number of administration appointees who
violated US law by not selling huge investments in corporations bidding
for government contracts.
- Failed to fulfill pledge to get Osama Bin Laden 'dead or alive.'
- Failed to capture the anthrax killer who tried to murder the leaders of
our country at the United States Capital building. After 18 months I
have no leads and zero suspects.
- In the 18 months following the 9/11 attacks successfully prevented any public
investigation into the biggest security failure in the history of the United States.
- Removed more freedoms & civil liberties for Americans than any other
President in US history.
- Entered office with the strongest economy in US history and in less
than two years turned every single economic category straight down.
Records and References:
- At least one conviction for drunk driving in Maine (Texas driving
record has been erased and is not available)
- AWOL from National Guard and military during a time of war.
- Refused to take drug test or even answer any questions about drug use.
- All records of tenure as governor of Texas have been spirited away to
father's library, sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
- All records of any SEC investigations into insider trading or bankrupt
companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
- All minutes of meetings for any public corporation served on the board
are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
- Any records or minutes from meetings he (or the Vice President)
attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and
unavailable for public review.
- For personal references please speak to my Dad or Uncle James Baker
(They can be reached at their offices of the Carlyle Group for
war-profiteering)